Voldemorts army Vanquished

The stage was set, finally it was time for Mulford’s Merry Men to take on "The old enemy" (Dave Hall, 2017). Brooklands were looking good (Chris Prentice was looking especially good) with a 100% win record in the league so far. Coach Pete had the boys out of bed a bit earlier to run through some sneaky short corner tactics before the opposition arrived. Spirits were high in the changing room as the DJ played the same 3 songs that he plays every week and the boys were ready to go.

The game started and after about 10 minutes a corner was won. Up steps up Poots for the flick and fires the ball into the bottom corner to take the lead. 1-0 Brooklands. It wasn’t long after that when Poots was given the ball in the D again and once again scored with a delightful reverse stick shot to double the lead. Adam Simpson was heard admiring Rowan’s skill from the video tower saying "there is no limit to the lads ability and he’s such top bloke ". 2-0 Brooklands.

Towards the end of the first half Brooklands won another corner and with some slick movements (that we had discussed at our morning meeting) Bowdon gave up and put the ball in their own net but Hillyer was awarded the goal. 3-0 Brooklands. At half time coach Pete informed us that we were still only in 2nd gear and we could step it up a notch. Lakin-Hall couldn’t believe what he was hearing as we was already knackered and wasn’t sure if he had anymore to give despite only being on the pitch for about 15 minutes.

The second half began rather slowly and it took the team a bit of time to get into that third gear but eventually they did with 2 goals in rather quick succession from the new boy and our foreign friend Kev Carroll. 2 goals on his debut and Watton is still yet to convert after 5 games... watch out pal, I hear the forwards in 3s are after your spot. 5-0 Brooklands.

Lakin-Hall eventually made an appearance to tap the ball in the goal. After the game Matt wanted everyone to know how many goals he’s scored in his 20 odd years of playing. Yea we get it, you’re old and you used to be quite good, it’s time to stop living in the past and move on. 6-0 Brooklands. In the last 5 minutes the team had a fantastic opportunity to make the score 7 and prove that we don’t mess around. Great team play created an easy 4 on 1 with the keeper, yes 4 on 1. Unfortunately one of those 4 was the Irish inbred and all round disappointment Stephen Murray. Failure to trap the ball ensured that we lost the ball and the chance was gone. Well done Steve, well done.

The score ended 6-0 and yes Van Bentum did manage to keep a clean sheet for the first time in his life. A strong performance from every got us the 3 points and sent those Bowdon scum back to their swamp lands with their less than average looking wives knowing that Brooklands will always be better than them in every way and they should just give up. Man of the match: Everyone except Steve Murray.